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Is the voice in your head a champion for who you are?

Is the voice in your head a champion for who you are?

When I was a kid there was a saying that speaking to yourself is the first sign of madness. I actually thought it was a truth, and so I concluded that I must definitely be mad because I spoke to myself all the time. This wasn’t something I had discussed with anyone else. It was an agreement that I made with myself: “You are mad”.

As I grew older and wiser I made a remarkable discovery [remarkable for me, anyway]. The voice in my head – the one that talks to me all the time – is in everybody’s head. And it plays all day long, like a radio station that plays in the background as we go about our daily business.

The BIG question is, “Is the voice in your head a champion for who you are, or is it a constant reminder of how inadequate you are?” In other words, what radio station are YOU tuned into? Is it ‘I ROCK 104.6 FM’? Or is it ‘I SUCK 94.2 AM’? And that, I feel, is a rhetorical question, since I know of very few people who have a beautiful, affirming singing voice in their head.

Okay. So we get to listen to I SUCK 94.2 AM all day long. And the longer and more we listen to it, the more we begin to believe what we’re hearing. “I’m not talented enough”. “I’m not pretty enough”. “I’m not smart enough”. “I’m not thin enough”. “I’m not fun enough”. “I’m not good enough”.

Before long, this becomes who we are. We become our mind, the voice in our head, and the agreements we make with ourselves, using that voice. “I’m not good enough” is an agreement you have made with your self. It’s not a fact or a truth. It’s not a great commandment that’s been written up in some book or manual. It’s not a sign that hangs above your bed. It’s a voice, in your head.

We identify ourselves with this voice – this person – and it constrains and contains our whole way of being. And so when Disclosure [an English electronic music duo] released their track ‘Voices’ in December I gave a small leap for joy.

There are voices in my head
And my heart is trying hard to drown them out
I keep hearing what they say
They’ve enticed me into what they’re all about

I love these lyrics. Because the way I see it, the way to drown out the voice in your head, and to wake up your tiger, is to listen to your heart. And the thing is, not only have we forgotten to listen to our heart, we have forgotten how to listen to our heart. And that’s because rationalism, intellect, and reason dominate at school as well as in the workplace.

If the voice in your head is running and ruining your experience of life, let me just say this to you. You are not the voice in your head, and you know that. We all know that.  You are the person in your heart. The person who feels. The person who cares. The person who cries. The person who loves and wants to be loved. Amen to that.

More reading: 

Are you living a fun-filled, rich, and joyful life?
Talent starts with a belief in yourself
How to stay positive during your job search
Companies don’t make things happen – people do!

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